Here's to Being Intentional In 2017.
Originally published on www.kesifelton.com
January 1, 2017
After writing a short reflection about what I've learned in 2016, I started to think about what exactly I want to accomplish in the upcoming year. I spent the majority of this year taking time to learn about myself, my aspirations, and the self-destructive habits I developed up to this point that I need to unlearn. In a journal entry I wrote on December 30, 2015, I wrote that I wanted to dedicate 2016 to self-confidence in my abilities and assurance about my place in the world and on my life journey which I would like to say I accomplished. I've realized that playing small about myself and my abilities doesn't do anything for me or anyone around me. I definitely still have my off-days, but for the most part, I can say that this is the biggest improvement that I've made in 2016. With that said, I've decided I'm going to dedicate 2017 to being intentional, and here are a few ways I plan to do so:
1) Being intentional about how I use social media.
My first-ever blog post was about the things I learned after deleting my Instagram account for a month. When I reactivated it in February, I noticed a lot more of my posts were more positive, captured a lot of the great memories I've experienced this year, and showed more appreciation for my friends and family. I try to use apps like Twitter, Instagram, and Snapchat to read and share thoughtful content and the great things that I see people doing, but I still find that I can spend a lot of time on social media doing absolutely nothing of value. Utilizing my social media more efficiently to connect with people who inspire me and share my work will definitely be a priority in 2017. Here are some more tips on how to use social media more intentionally.
2) Being intentional about doing what scares me.
I've found that whenever I do things that, at first, may be totally outside of my comfort zone, I end up learning the most from it. Being uncomfortable with doing something new may seem impossible at first, and feeling that way is completely human, but it goes back to the idea of playing small and doubting your abilities. Even if this new thing gets difficult, realize that once you get through it, you've gotten through it and that you'll more than likely become a better person because of it, makes taking risks more worthwhile.
3) Being intentional with my time.
I'll admit that I'm a certified multitasker, and it's one of the things I intend to work on in 2017. The difference between how I work and interact with the world when I'm solely focused on the task at hand versus when I have a multitude of distractions around me is stark: Working with a clear and engaged mind with all of my energy and attention on what or who I'm dealing with versus fumbling haphazardly through things with an extremely distracted mind. Society teaches us that being able to quickly do multiple things at once is the best thing but in reality, it strips us of our ability to truly concentrate and fully show up for our own lives. In 2017 I hope to be pickier with what I choose to give my time and energy to, and then give 100% of my time and energy to those things.
4) Being intentional with my relationships.
Before 2016, the idea that creating healthy relationships actually takes a lot of hard work was unbeknownst to me. This year, working on my relationships with God, my family, and friends has made life so much more fun. Purposely surrounding myself with people who are hard-working, loving, and positive definitely inspires me to want to do the same. Creating close and genuine relationships with people who want to see me succeed and who will unapologetically hold me accountable for my actions has been one of the best decisions I've made. These are the kinds of people that you enjoy being around and growing with, and undoubtedly set the standard for the rest of your relationships. Over this year I've learned that you don't have to be close-minded when it comes to the people in your life. Meeting people from all different walks of life and hearing their stories is one of my favorite things, but I have to remain cognizant of who I let close to me and the role they play in my life as well as mine in theirs. Doing so takes a lot of the pressure of feeling like I need to put myself out for everyone and spreading myself thin off of my shoulders, which ultimately allows me to fully show up for others in the way they need me to more often.
5) Being intentional about living with gratitude.
The one thing that has been the most transformative in what my life looks and feels like is gratitude. Waking up every day and simply being grateful for everything that I have in a world that is constantly searching for more has caused me to grow to love my life. This doesn't mean that I don't hope for certain things, I just have to practice being happy with what God has already given me before I can be open to receiving anything else. I'm still searching for the most out of this life, but that doesn't mean that I am lacking at all, because I definitely have everything I need. I am also practicing giving without any expectation of anything in return. Understanding that if I continue to have faith in God and know that He's got me regardless, I won't be so dependent on other people to do things for me. Expecting people to always come through for you is almost naive as it doesn't give that person room to make mistakes and a safe, loving space to recognize and learn from them. This allows you to be able to show genuine appreciation when people do take the time to do things for you and hopefully inspires them to reciprocate the same level of unconditional love.
While I wouldn't necessarily count these as New Year’s resolutions, as I've already started to incorporate these into my life, the new year always gives people the idea of a fresh start so why not? Accomplishing your goals for 2017 will only work if you have a plan and supportive people around to hold you accountable. If you genuinely want to make a change (or changes) in your life, go ahead and write down those long-term goals and create short-term habits that will actualize those goals. If you slip up, it's okay, just don't wait until the next New Year to get back on track.
–kf
